ranking school subjects

this was so long overdue HELP im gonna complete it now. this is my rubrics

1) how much i enjoy it

2) my motivation to study it

3) how useful it is to me

4) how good i am at it

ONE - e-math and a-math | 10/10 enjoyment, motivation, usefulness and skill, and controversy

enemies to lovers relationship with this subject fr. im going to marry math one day haha ANYWAYS math just brings so much joy maybe because of that feeling of satisfaction when you can solve a question and you just want to keep chasing that feeling (i sound like a drug addict i know HAHA) anyways now i realised what that feeling is and basically it's this focus thing called flow and like im so focused doing math and flow like releases chemicals like adrenaline etc. that's why it feels nice doing math 

TWO - history | 9/10 enjoyment, 7/10 motivation, 1/10 usefulness, 5/10 skill     

i was always fascinated by how humans react/behave and history literally gives me that. in history, you get to see what humans did last time (albeit made some stupid actions) and how it impacted society. it's just so so cool to see how society works and reacts and how we kind of all react the same way.. ok im not making sense but basically human behaviour is so weird but cool at the same time (im writing like im not a human myself but i promise i am AHHA) oh but this subject is so not useful in the future LIKE im gonna be a engineer and that degree doesn't require anything related to human stuff so..

THREE - chemistry | 7/10 enjoyment, 7/10 motivation, 2/10 usefulness, 6/10 skill

the reason for my passion in chemistry is because two of my fav teachers are chem teachers (teacher affirmation is real! this happened to me for english in primary school) and because i like them, i want to do good in the subject so i work hard :D also chemistry has some bits of math so bonus points ig.. YEAH i think i like very factual subjects and chemistry is a very factual subjects. also for chem, you don't really have to memorise and when you truly understand the subject, then you can do well in exams. however, it's not useful to me because i want to be engineer LOLL

FOUR - physics | 6/10 enjoyment, 5/10 motivation, 9/10 usefulness, 8/10 skill

idk but maybe the reason i dont like physics as much as im supposed to is because the teacher isn't that entertaining but like ig im good at it and it's basically applied math. like it's math but with more memorisation and application and those who think math is useless, take physics. physics is also common sense like rn we're learning pressure and it's basically force/area. so like why does a sharp knife cut better than a dull one? because the surface area is less. wow! ikr. also useful because of my whole engineering thing LMAO

FIVE - ss | 6/10 enjoyment, 0/10 motivation, 3/10 usefulness, 6/10 skill

PLS I LITERALLY DON'T STUDY SS BECAUSE WE HAVE SO LITTLE CLASS AND IT'S BASICALLY HISTORY BUT APPLIED IN TODAYS CONTEXT. it's interesting if your class participates but half the class falls asleep/doesn't know what to say when the teacher asks questions. but honestly i feel like ss can make some really strong discussions among people and i realkly want to discuss stuff like govt policies etc. but no one gets me so im just nerding out by myself. actually most of the time i nerding out by mysekf.

SIX - english and malay | 2/10 enjoyment, 1/10 motivation, 10/10 usefulness, 8/10 skill

putting these two together cus they're basically the same thing. idk man but nowadays i feel like we're not learning language but just learning how to write (english) or learn some random thing that i already know about (malay). i already reached a high level of fluency for both of them so honestly it's just boring sitting there and listening to the cher talk or do some discussion thing which again, BARELY PEOPLE TALK ABOUT THE ACTUAL THING. i mean sometimes, it's not bad because we talk abt random stuff LOL

SEVEN - geography | i hate it/10 enjoyment, 1/10 motivation, how is this useful/10 usefulness, 4/10 skill

I HATE GEOGRAPHY. ok rn the topics are cool. like tourism? yes please im working in a sub-section of the tourism industry, weather and climate? i've always asked myself questions like how do clouds form? but let me tell you about studying geography. i DONT WANT TO STUFY GEOGRAPHY IT'S SUCH A PAIN AND UGH WHY DO GEOG EXAMS EXIST. if they don't exist, i'd bump the enjoyment to 7/10 tbh UGH why does the school system force us to do exams? like i just want to learn about dumb clouds :')

THIS WAS A SUPER LONG BLOG POST. not sorry at all.

- ilyana